Annoying Questions To Which I Received No Response: Part 2 of 17
[Text messaged on Sunday, March 26th to a colleague of Randy's who was kind enough to volunteer as our designated driver to and from a celebratory work event for roughly a thousand people, an event at which Randy was specifically recognized and called to the stage to accept an award-- an act of good fortune that apparently necessitated my drunk ass to stand and scream, "YEAH THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT BRING IT OH YEAH THAT'S MY MAN RIGHT THERE MINE THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT," an act I would soon follow by: a) taking my bra off and throwing it away in the restroom, b) publicly making fun of the hired speaker by insisting loudly that this wasn't church and that I didn't want to get up and hug anybody, goddamn it, and c) sincerely promising the misty-eyed woman next to me that I was henceforth accepting it as my personal responsibility to get her laid at next month's function:]"Hey, when you get a chance, can you see if my shoe is in your car?"
